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Wizard of Changes -- ©cdozo 2004 to 2015

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Me At Sixteen [Oct. 21st, 2008|02:56 pm]
Wizard of Changes -- ©cdozo 2004 to 2015
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[The river is |nostalgicnostalgic]


Me -- first passport photo (taken by GHC I)
 
Passport photo taken by my dad.

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Comments:
[User Picture]From: jenrose1
2008-10-21 11:12 pm (UTC)
Wow! Lovely
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 02:00 am (UTC)
Thanks.
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[User Picture]From: ndozo
2008-10-21 11:15 pm (UTC)
I remember this. You're so pretty. Too bad it isn't in color. Your eyes are so blue. You look like you.
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 01:59 am (UTC)
I like that it's black and white. I've always liked this picture. I'm glad I finally got it scanned in.
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-22 01:43 am (UTC)
I don't exactly know all why but this is such a moving post
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-22 01:44 am (UTC)
where were you going
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 01:58 am (UTC)
Before I tell you do you want to use the photo for a writing prompt? Make up where I was going and why. Post what you write here and I'll tell you the real answer.

Anyone else who wants to play can post too.


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[User Picture]From: e_moon60
2008-10-22 02:30 am (UTC)
Where are you going, Isabeau? they asked. She said nothing, just held out her passport to the man at the barrier. He said something to the other one; she ignored that, already deep in the dream journey she'd long desired.

A world awaited: oceans, islands, beaches, mountains, languages she knew and those she had never heard. She had no single answer for "Where are you going?" but "Out!" and no answer at all for "When will you be back?"

All who saw her, and thought they knew who she was, and where she was going, and how she would get there, were mistaken.


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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 04:35 am (UTC)
I love this. It reminds me of the Guy Clark song, "She Ain't Going Nowhere:"

"Standing on the gone side of leaving,
She found her thumb and stuck it in the breeze,
She'll take anything that's going close to somewhere,
She can lay it down and live it like she please,

She ain't going nowhere, she's just leaving
She ain't going nowhere she can't breathe in,
And she ain't going home that's for sure."

Your piece and this song capture that leaving moment so well.
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From: (Anonymous)
2008-10-22 05:02 am (UTC)
Wow! e_moon, that is lovely. I felt like I fell into a little world for a second. And it's also kind of accurate.
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[User Picture]From: ndozo
2008-10-22 05:03 am (UTC)
sorry, that was me
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[User Picture]From: amysn
2008-10-22 02:38 pm (UTC)
Awesome, beautiful. Makes me want to go too.
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[User Picture]From: amysn
2008-10-22 02:40 pm (UTC)
That is, e-moon's writing about the photo is beautiful. Post about the photo, elsewhere....
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-22 11:44 am (UTC)
I'll play
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 12:09 pm (UTC)
Yay!
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[User Picture]From: e_moon60
2008-10-22 02:26 am (UTC)
What a marvelous picture! It captures the you that you became...you were, but you were still becoming, and it's you now, too.

If that makes sense at all.
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-22 02:41 am (UTC)
I agree. It's somehow more than just a photo.


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[User Picture]From: amysn
2008-10-22 02:42 pm (UTC)
Look at you! Wonderful photo. A bit younger than when I first met you, but not by much. I know where you were going, I think, so won't ruin the game. Great to see this photo.
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-22 04:46 pm (UTC)
Passport photo

My father turned on the light and I felt the warmth bouncing off the umbrella onto my face and he said look here and I watched him peering down into his old Rolloflex, finding me, moving his thumb along one of the wheels on the side of the camera, bringing me into focus and then zooming in a little more.
I was sixteen and standing barefoot on the grey seamless he set up in our living room and I don’t think I ever felt more in focus in my life as I did then. He didn’t have to tell me to turn my head or lift my chin, I had a hold on who I was and felt full of who I might be and do and the picture my father would develop later in his darkroom---that lightless space he built in our basement where he was disappearing for longer and longer hours as my mother went to her pottery classes or rumba and tango lessons or beginning Japanese---that picture would be of the me I would lose that summer backpacking around Europe on five dollars a day. The serious, daring, voluptuous, shy, awkward me that I was suddenly reckless with, traded easily for other things, used to get places I thought I wanted to go, changed and changed and changed to fit the way I thought I had to and then at some point completely discarded and forgot. That me would still be there in a box of my stuff in the basement after my mother and father were gone. I threw it away and half the contents of the box when I found it, I was saving too much. But then, I changed my mind, untied several garbage bags before I retrieved it, because I think now the passport photo will be my way back…

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[User Picture]From: ndozo
2008-10-22 07:57 pm (UTC)
Wow. This is tough. I like it. I flinched a little at first (I don't like sad things), but now it seems like it will be ok. Very cool piece.

This process seems much more useful than nanowrimo although I found the Cooper's Indians group recently and it cracked me up just thinking of that essay. Cooper's Indians. Lol.
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-22 08:07 pm (UTC)

its not SO sad

yeah, i came across the coopers indians group recently too and thought, oh, hmm, its almost that time of year again, boy, i really wrote that novel and finished the old one too, didn't i, wow, nanowrimo is so...

your right, this is more useful...

i'll have to go check now to see where she was really going... airplane tickets were so cheap right about that time

Edited at 2008-10-23 02:13 am (UTC)
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-23 10:06 pm (UTC)
Changes, yes! You nailed it perfectly. That's what this picture is about.

The beginning made me sad. It was kind of like what really happened except that my dad took the picture at his studio. I miss my dad. And I'd forgotten the feel of my bare feet on the background paper.

Nicely done.
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[User Picture]From: curculio
2008-10-23 01:01 am (UTC)

Yesterday

You haven't changed a bit except you didn't have your hair in a tail. That seems to be the same t-shirt I saw you in last time, too.
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[User Picture]From: dinahprincedaly
2008-10-23 05:56 pm (UTC)
...so WHERE did YOU GO with your passport at 16?
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-23 10:14 pm (UTC)
It was summer 1971. My sister had gone backpacking around Europe with a friend. I got stuck at home with a case of mono and two summer school classes. In spite of the mono, I somehow got an A and a B. In the meantime, ndozo had a falling out with her traveling companion and was on her own.

So, as a reward for the good grades and consolation for being sick most of the summer, my folks sent me to meet with ndozo and travel around Europe for the rest of the summer. Plane fares were low, but the dollar was not doing well. We did fine. We traveled cheap and had a good time.
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[User Picture]From: ndozo
2008-10-23 11:40 pm (UTC)

remember that dog?

"...point his mouth away from you if he starts to throw up..."
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-23 11:46 pm (UTC)

Re: remember that dog?

Roddy.
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From: (Anonymous)
2008-10-25 07:20 am (UTC)

Re: remember that dog?

thank you! i was trying to remember.
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[User Picture]From: sing4you
2008-10-23 06:05 pm (UTC)

Synchronicity

Wow. I have a high school picture that looks just like that.
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[User Picture]From: cdozo
2008-10-23 10:15 pm (UTC)

Re: Synchronicity

Can you post it?
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