Scum-sucking ticks! Vile putrid globs of yucktoplasm! Parasitic robots! Excremental obstacles to civil society! Lazy spit-swilling dustbunnies from Hell! Fabulous arguments for AND against gun control! Mantrap inspirers! Perverted protein/carbon garlic musTURDs! Pathetic human representatives of stupid slang words for reproductive organs! Doomed-to-die hickeys that they gave themselves! Unloveable wastes of fingers and toes! Organ donors (soon pleez pleez...)!

If you were me, by now you would have made up some country-song-sappy story of how that radio saved Christmas for the poor little family, ("illegal" aliens perhaps, or newly bereft, or soon to be bereft) and the person (mother, father, child) who took it was so desperate they were about to do something
awful (even more awful than stealing the radio) then, like a miracle, the FSM led them to Nippy and then, as a vision, (cue the cloud choir going "AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH") the desperado saw THE RADIO!!!!! Salvation! Christmas is saved, the children's faith in their parents is maintained, and you get to get even a better radio because that one, although new, was going to crap out soon anyway only you didn't know it, only the FSM did. You may not understand why seemingly bad things happen, but for all you know, those radio thieves saved your life. SO go find them and give them a big fat kiss, and a kick in the nuts, and get on with your life. And look in other trucks, there's probably a better radio that'll fit nicely in your truck, and you know the cops won't bother you if you take it. The FSM works in mysterious ways. Sorry your radio got took.

a_ _... ok. a blank blank, and hole... anthole? armhole? that's a word and I guess there had to be a hole for the arm of the stealer, but I don't think that's it ... Amyhole? That's not nice. Agehole, nah, hmmmmmmmm ...Amphole? Abehole? Abe Lincoln? Hole? No no no no. ... Aba? Abahole? There was that band, but I think they had two b's ...Arfhole? Like saying 'awful' with an accent? Kind of racist, but I'm not sure what race it's racist about, but I don't think that's it ... damn this is not easy and it's only Monday! I'm getting slower for sure ... I guess it must be armhole. You must have meant that someone broke an armhole in your truck. Really, if you're going to write puzzle clues, try to be a little clearer. These vague and imprecise clues just annoy people. Honestly. Armhole my ass.

Will Weng could have told you, it was AIRhole!

Damn, now I miss Will Weng. He was the Lixion Avila of crossword puzzle editors.

Crap! AIR hole! Argh! How could I not have gotten that?!? Grr! Well, back to crossword school for me.

And quit bellyaching. Will Weng deserved a break, and we still have Forecaster Avila. I bet he was all interested and serious about the tornadoes last night. I was afraid they would get to that Quaker school that R went back to yesterday, but it seems like just strong wind and rain today. It was 64 degrees there yesterday. Some places got slammed though. It doesn't seem fair to have tornadoes in "winter."

My landlady was appalled when I mentioned hiding under the truck with a chainsaw and cutting the thieve's feet off. The logistics would be impossible, but the thought is quite satisfying, as is putting rat traps by the wiring harness up inside the dash board.

I think the alarm for car radios is called a car alarm, and people complain about them all the time. ;-)

I'm sorry your radio got stollen; I'm glad you did not chainsaw the poor sob's legs off; I'm sorry people steal; I'm sorry people have to steal; I'm sorry that some people don't have to steal but do so anyway; I'm sorry there are junkies. The only good that comes out of any of this is that ndozo's riff was amazing. (But I truly am sorry - that is a bum.)

Edited at 2008-01-09 05:39 am (UTC)

It's true. Her comment title is the best title ever!

I've got a radio for you. Pretty old but it works and has a cassette and a line in. Supposed to be for a CD but I'm sure would work for a mp3 player too. It was in my Goodwill pile.

I'd have given it to you at Christmas but I didn't know you needed one then. Wait, you didn't need one then. Or maybe you did and didn't know it.

The year's got to get better now, right?

PS - That diatribe was truly amazing, n.

How wonderful! Do you have my address?

In Wiscasset, there used to be two rotting schooners in the harbor. One was named the Luther Little, and the other the Hester. The two schooners became a symbol of "Maine's prettiest village" (as it says on the welcome sign).



Unfortunately, they are no longer there. But you are. I think. Right?

Nope, I'm not there yet. I'm still at my rent house with Napoleon and Illya's enemies by the wood.

I'll e-mail the details to you.

Got it.
So that's why I have a new but didn't delete the old.